It’s 5:30 am, and I’m awake thinking. My husband is feeding our daughter the milk I pumped at 5:00 and I’m supposed to be writing for NaNoWriMo, but I’m having a hard time concentrating. I woke up to this.
I don’t have cable TV, so I didn’t see the news until I woke up. As I sat there in the dark and began to scroll through my Facebook, I was overwhelmed by #pray4Paris posts, and as I learned about what I happened I was astounded once again by the capability we humans have to hate one another. I don’t know why these terrorists killed so many people, and what the answer is to this crisis. I see my friends demanding that the President take action. But what exactly is he supposed to do? The killers are dead or in hiding, and no official terrorist organization has claimed responsibility.
Sometimes I feel like Americans expect us to go busting into a country at the slightest sign of trouble like:
But it’s not that simple.
But another thing I noticed along my feed was the plethora of posts praying for people we don’t even know. As appalled as I am by the amount of hate humans can express towards one another, I am always overwhelmed by the sheer magnitude of love we shower over people in need. I’m glad to see that America is offering aid to those who need it, and that we stand ready to help in any way that we can. We don’t have to rush over there, guns blazing in a blind rage. But we will be ready to stand beside them shoulder to shoulder if they need us.
And of course because we aren’t all in the military or part of an organization who has the means to “actually” go over there to help them, there are other ways that you can help. How can you help? Donate to the French Red Cross. The American Red Cross is not accepting donations at this time for the Paris attacks, but the French Red Cross has already mobilized to help those in need. They can certainly use our help.
That’s not the only thing on my mind though. I’m participating in NaNoWriMo this year, and it’s tougher than it’s ever been for me. For those of you reading who don’t know what that is, NaNoWriMo is a writing competition that takes place during the month of November. You have exactly one month to write 50,000 completely unique words in the form of a novel. You can’t have pre-written anything either, although you can brainstorm. I’ve successfully completed NaNoWriMo in 2011, 2012, and 2013. Last year I was too pregnant and too tired to compete. My brain was being sucked dry by my growing daughter. So this year since my body is my own again, I decided to compete and I’ve been consistently a day behind. It’s very hard to keep up with the writing quota when you’re caring for a baby. 🙂 I’m not complaining. It’s just a fact.
I’ve noticed things that have changed about my life since Lilly was born. I don’t write that often. I don’t blog that often. I rarely play video games anymore, and my house is always a mess. (although my house was always a mess before, but now I can blame it on being a mom)
But none of those things bother me. My daughter is the most exciting thing in my universe and I couldn’t be happier. She is healthy, extremely happy, and just the most beautiful little girl that I have ever seen. She fascinates me more than anything, and she is everything that I ever wanted. I knew I wanted to be a mom, but it wasn’t until she was born that I understood just how much I could love someone, and it is overwhelming. A friend of mine once told me that being a mother will make you feel more vulnerable than anything you will ever experience again, and she was right.
My daughter is 8 months old now if you can believe it. She’s crawling (guh!), standing up with the aid of furniture and is saying “mama” when upset and “dadadadadada” 90% of the rest of the time. My husband is pleased. 🙂
Here are some updated photos of everyone.
Who had a Harry Potter party? Um…WE DID! Yeah, we’re that cool. Be jealous if you weren’t there. Message me if you want to be next year. 🙂
Guys, I can’t even! She’s going to be running all over my house at any second!
And some super sweet cuteness. Finger painting in the bath tub. Don’t worry, it was just yogurt and food coloring. She ate most of it.
Let’s start today on a good note. I’m going to say a prayer for Paris, send a donation to the French Red Cross, and try to get my word count in before I get distracted again. Peace.