Daily Post Prompt – A Freeing Moment

I haven’t blogged in quite a while so I thought I’d grab a writing prompt and go with it.  They haven’t posted the weekly prompt, so the daily prompt is the next best thing.

The prompt asks me to write about a blog post that made me nervous to publish, and then gave me a sense of freedom when I did.

That would easily be the start of my “Endometriosis Diaries” posts.  Only a select group of people knew that I was diagnosed with the disease, and it had become (and still is unfortunately) a huge part of my life.  I knew that publishing something like that could possibly label me as a “victim” among my “Facebook Acquaintances”, and those who subscribe here that don’t personally know me.

Getting sympathy wasn’t the reason why I started blogging about Endometriosis.  Other people were.  Throughout my journey prior to having surgery, I was obsessed with researching homeopathic remedies on the internet.  My doctor was doing everything she could for me, but the problems were all still there, slapping me in the face.  I wanted to find a diet, a tea, or something natural I could put in my body that would keep the monster at bay.

I found a TON of stuff, which I tried each in turn.  Anti-inflammatory teas, anti-inflammatory juicing, gluten free diet, the most restrictive diet of my life and finally blogs on surgery.

I’d had surgery before, but I wanted it to be my last resort.  However, it was all of these blogs that pushed me to do my blog.  If was sitting here, googling my brains out (hehe dirty), then so was someone else!  If those opinions and helpful tips helped me, then it was my responsibility to help someone else too!  One of those pay it forward kind of things.

So with that in mind, the Endometriosis Diaries was born with a sarcastic post entitled TMI, but My Uterus Hates Me.

I was very nervous about posting about it.  I thought some people might be grossed out as I later went into pretty graphic detail on the disease.  I also worried that others might become uncomfortable because I was sharing such private details about my body.  But looking back I shouldn’t have been.

Here’s what I received from my posts:

Encouragement
Support
Love
And inquiries from many about the disease itself.  This was important to me.  I was raising awareness.  I had countless friends approach me with the same line.  “How did you know that you had it?”  or “What were the symptoms again?”  “I have a similar problem, but I’m not sure what to do about it.”  “A friend of mine has those same problems.”

I was startled by the amount of questions I received from friends who had been silently suffering and NOT going to their doctors about it!  It baffled me.  I of course told them all the same thing.  “This is what it felt like.  But you have to see a doctor.”

I actually have had quiet a few referrals sent over to my own doctor, but others heeded my advice and went to seek professional help.

That makes me feel free.  Knowing that I maybe helped someone, start the journey that I went on to end the battle with their issues.  Whether they have Endometriosis or not, it’s a  terrible thing to suffer in silence.  When you want to shout out to everyone you know, to be gentle with you because you’re hurting.  Or ask life to go easy on you just for today so that you can regroup from your daily ordeals with your disease.  But life moves on.  It doesn’t slow down, and  you have to keep taking those steps forward.  I know that sounds extremely cliche, but it’s true.

An Update on My Endometriosis:

I’ve felt great since my surgery up until the last few weeks.  Similar pains are coming back, fatigue has crept in once or twice, and my scars from the surgery haven’t even stopped twinging yet.
I knew it would happen when I chose to be birth control free, but it made me so angry.  Less than four months.  That’s all I get?  I don’t want to be loaded with hormones.  I feel GOOD without birth control.  Unfortunately, it’s the only thing that can keep the problems at bay.  I made my choice and this is the consequence.

But overall, I still feel great.  I’m far more productive with my writing, and other writing related projects.  My next post will be a big announcement regarding my upcoming Literary Magazine, coming December 2013!

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